justsayyes | [Inbox]

We've already established that you don't really believe this is just the Admiral's attempt to...strengthen his own narrative.

If you don't believe I'm affected by this, feel free to test me.

This is stupid. What's the point in testing when you can't prove that this... annoying problem only happens with lies, every time?

Do you think it's feasible that something else is the case?

You're saying it's not possible?

I'm not saying that.

I'm saying that a flood which makes people regurgitate live insects, either when they lie or when you personally think it would be convenient for them to do so, is extremely unlikely.

I'm also saying that you're too intelligent to fail to recognize that.

I'm saying that the Admiral could be controlling it, not me.

[Which doesn't produce any bees, if only because she's just explaining her theory rather than directly asserting that's what's happening.]

And we could spend hours dissecting the semantic possibilities.

If you don't want to talk to me until this is over, just say you don't want to talk to me.

I'm just saying that I don't have to believe anything just because of a stupid flood.

That is what you're saying.

And if you don't want to talk to me, just say you don't want to talk to me.

I never want to talk to you.

[Buzz, buzz.]

You're annoying

[Smaller buzz. He's only annoying sometimes.]

[A smile.]

Is there anything you'd like to know, Jasper?

What's that supposed to mean? You like being stung or something?

Of course I don't like being stung.

You've always at least appeared to be suspicious of my motives. I'm sure I've said a lot that you believe comes from a place of self interest. I'm offering you an opportunity to address all that.

Fine.

What will you do if I never graduate.

That depends on what you mean by 'never graduate'.

If you tell me you no longer want me as a warden, I'll request with the Admiral that we be unpaired. When you have a new permanent assignment, I'll go home.

If that doesn't happen, and you're here for ten years, I'm here for ten years. That's very unlikely, however.

If you disappear, I'll wait for a couple of months to be sure you won't return, and if you don't, I'll go home.

If I disappear, I may not remember any of this and I may not be able to return.

[Jasper scoffs softly. Maybe he believes that now, but...]

You can't enjoy being stuck with me.

If it was just you and me on board, then I probably couldn't cope with that longterm. The impact on my mental health would be intolerable. But I would say the same thing of any one other person's company.

In reality, that's not what life on the Barge is. The trauma is very real, and I won't claim it isn't. However, being here has also broadened my horizons and created opportunities that I couldn't have even imagined, back in Detroit.

In short, I can't respond to that statement because I disagree with it. I'm not 'stuck here with you'.

So I could be anyone, then. It doesn't matter who you're paired with.

No. If I had been paired with anybody else, I would have contested that with the Admiral. If he hadn't listened, I would have left the Barge.

Oh yeah? [Challenging.]

Why. What could you possible like about having to spend time with me?

...I can admit that sometimes it's frustrating, to see you caught up in the same cycles of thinking. I've had to come to recognize that that's my own inadequacy talking. A lot of the time you let your self-loathing take the reins, and there's little I can do to fix that, besides being here to support your own healing.

But when it's you talking, you're fascinating. You have a unique perspective, and you're more adaptable than you'll let yourself believe.

[She's silent for a long moment.]

Tell me.

What's fascinating. Why do you care?

I don't matter to anyone else. I think it's what I am, not who.

...Part of it is that I saw something familiar in you. You were created for a specific purpose, but it's clear that you have the capacity to decide something else for yourself. That's what initially caught my interest.

But that wasn't really your question. I care because you have boundless potential and it pains me to see it go to waste. You're strong, intelligent, loyal, trustworthy. I just wish you could see those traits as more than a stick to keep beating yourself with.

Am I like your robots?

[His other self hadn't been subtle about the comparison, but she didn't know how to feel about it. Or much about what it meant to Elijah, either.]

As I said, the superficial parallels are there.

Beyond that? I created a race of sentient beings and loosed them on a world which I knew wouldn't accept them. I knew there would be violence. Deaths. And I didn't care. I did it because I was capable of doing it, and I wanted to see what would happen.

We don't have the creator-creation relationship that would make you 'like' my androids. Your sentience has never been in doubt. There's only one of you. And I don't see you as an experiment, or as a way to validate my own ego.

So my answer is no. You're not.

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